11 January 2011

Why Adam(Man) Is Simpler Than Eve(Woman)?


Man has been the simpler than woman since God decided to mould some clay and breathe life into it to call the man as Adam and the woman as Eve.

God gifted the beautiful Garden of Eden and asked them to stay there and enjoy in their naked tranquility. There was once simple thing to do - God told them not to eat the fruit of The Tree of Knowledge. Peace.

Now this is what must have happened with Adam and Eve. (The following scene is fictionalized)  

Adam: This is just so cool. All I have to do is just roam around, eat and pray and enjoy life. Nothing to do. I love God. He made it so simple for us. And as far as the Tree of Knowledge is concerned, I'll never go near it. Wait! Where's Eve.........shit.....

And just around the Tree of Knowledge was Eve 'talking' to herself: (Moving her hands through her head and checking her image in the nearby pond) Gosh!!! It's so boring here. All I have to do is talk to myself. I hate thinking. Thinking is so like....Adam. He hardly talks! I'm Eve. I like talking. I wish there was someone whom I could talk to. I wonder what the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge tastes like. Yaaa! I wish there was someone who could tell me what to do. The Garden of Eden is awesome, but I'm sure the Forbidden Fruit is the most awesome, that's why God kept reserved it for Him/Her-self (Just in case some feminist pops up and says God is a Woman :p) Oh, how I wish I could talk to someone...it's so boring...

The Serpent near the Tree of Knowledge was listening to Eve's rants. FYI, the serpent has the ability to speak and reason and is identified with the wisdom of this world. (Some people joke that the reasoning ability was not required as he was speaking to Eve; all he had to do was 'talk'...hehehe) 

Serpent to Eve: Yo wassup baby? Damn....you're hot! How you doing? (And then the Serpent checked Eve out from top to bottom. I think he had tasted the Forbidden Fruit)

Eve to Serpent: Wow...I have company..yoohoo! What are you? Who are you? What's your name? Where do you stay? Wanna have lunch with me? Do you know what the Forbidden Fruit tastes like?

Serpent to Eve: Slow down girl...I'm just a serpent, not a woman! Well, all I know is that the Forbidden Fruit is actually not forbidden. It's the best fruit of the Garden and ......................

......... as soon as Serpent was about to give the reason...Eve plucked a fruit and had a bite, and at that moment Adam came. As soon as she gulped the morsel she looked at Adam and ....

Eve to Adam: Well hello, handsome! I never knew you were soooooo HOT...this fruit has made me 'look' at you in a different light. Winking to the Serpent, if you know what I mean? ;)

Adam (sighing): Why did you eat it Eve? Why? There were 6.384 billion types of fruits in the Garden. I just tasted a few hundred and you had to screw this up...why? It was so SIMPLE...God told not to eat the Forbidden Fruit, but you did exactly the opposite. Now God will throw us out. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Now what? Ah shit! Because you tasted the Forbidden Fruit, both of us are gonna be thrown out, might as well take a bite..

And Adam takes a bite....and then he realises why Eve was finding him HOT! And then God shouted and they covered their modesty with some leaves.... and the rest is history! (Well, God was pissed off and he cursed the Serpent and demoted Adam and Eve to Earth and we cribbed unhappily ever after)


All the first man and woman had to do was chill...that too in the Garden of Paradise! But, the woman could not understand one SIMPLE instruction and screwed it up for both men and women, and we all are here on Earth, still the same. Men making life simple and women tangling and complicating stuff. 

I'm not a misogynist. It's just that....it's a fact that women have to accept that they love to complicate things and men are simpler. And don't blame me, it's a problematic 'quality' passed on to the female DNA by Eve. 

2 comments:

  1. Heheeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tooo good!!!!! i think this one was your best work till date....and yeah we don't love to complicate things.....they get get complicated by themselves!!!

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  2. @Nupur: Realllyyyy !!!???!!! ....was it so good?
    thanks :)))
    And as for your statement...no ... situations don't complicate themselves :P

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